The Death of a Friendship?
Picture two girls standing opposite each other. They have a ball filled with egg. That ball they toss back and forth to each other with the knowledge and trust that each will catch the ball safely before it falls to the ground and breaks... there is an exchange there... a central insight that even if it does fall and break, both will reach to catch it, even if they knock heads. This goes on for quite some time and their mutual respect for each other grows rapidly.One day however, one girl suddenly decides not to catch the ball anymore. The other girl continues on while the ball keeps falling and breaking on contact, leaving egg all over the place for her to clean up, hoping that in time her friend will decided she wants to catch the ball again, but that day never seems to come, and each day that passes she becomes more hurt and feels more rejected than she's ever felt. So I ask you this... how long do you think she can keep it up? How much is too much? When does someone decide to give up on someone else? Is there such a line? IS friendship really that fragile?
I used to think that I'd have my friends forever, that once you make such a huge bond with someone it would be very hard to break, that it would take something earth moving for me to feel like turning my back on everything I believe in simply because I have no option left.
Can you REALLY know someone the way you think you do? Or are they just letting you see what they want you to, and keeping the rest hidden? If that's the case, and there's a reason they are keeping things from you, at what point do you intervene and do the "I'm telling you this because I love you line."..you know the one.. the things that you KNOW will hurt them but feel they must hear in order for you both to get out of whatever black hole you have found yourselves in. Or do you not risk it at all?
I've had exactly one Best Friend in my life, she was tragically taken six years ago in a terrible accident. Since then and the term "best friend" has been a troublesome thing for me. I'm not sure why I feel the need to slot the people close to me into categories and most people will never understand it's meaning or purpose, but to me, to call someone other than Harely my "best friend" feels like a direct betrayal of everything we were together and everything we believed in about friendship, and let's not misunderstand.. we both had a complete, and full understanding and belief in what we thought friendship meant. And a lot of the time it simply meant mutual respect and unconditional, unspoken love. Take from that what you will, but that's how it was. So why do I feel it's so wrong to "label" someone other than Harely my best friend? Well, I supposed the answer to that is specialness. Everyone means something different. You love your husband in a different way to how you love your daughter, or how you love your dog. You feel differently about everyone around you and though you may not consciously label them this separation of emotions for different people does just that without you even realising you have.
But what's in a word? What do you consider a best friend to be? It may just be the person you go to the club with on a friday night and not have anything else to do with. It may be the person you met at school whom you still talk to after all these years even though you rarely see them. It may even be the person you spend pretty much every waking second with or have the most in common with, but whatever the circumstance, these are all "best friends", no?
So what do you do when you feel your "best friend"...maybe even someone you considered to be your "soul mate".... or even family, starts withdrawing from this friendship you have with them? Do you let them go with the philosophy on your mind that if you love them then set them free.... or do you hold on like hell and tell them you're not giving up without a fight? This is what I cannot come to terms with. I cannot make that decision no matter how hard I try to be. So... here I am... condumrum in tow.
FUN
Okay, so I've been tagged by Kyra to do this...
You must write an entry about 6 weird habits/things as well as state this rule clearly. In the end you need to choose the next six people to be tagged and list their names. Oh hell ALL of me is weird.. I only get to choose 6?
1. I have a big double bed, but only ever use the right side of it. I feel weird if I sleep on the left. (from the point of view if you're standing at the foot of the bed looking at the pillow)
2. I simply cannot stand stupid people. (anyone who has ever read back in my blog or knows me well will know what I am talking about, so this comprises about half the population LOL)
******FYI THIS IS REALLY HARD******
3. I can usually tell within the first few minutes of meeting someone whether or not I will get along with them.
4. I am supposed to wear glasses for reading and what not.. but NEVER do. So I will probably go blind by the time I am my Mother's age.. who does the same thing.. she'll go to read something, but hold it about a foot from her face to see it...that's me in 20 years. I'm not wearing them right now!
5. I quote from certain tv shows in everyday conversations. (a few to name are the Simpsons, Buffy, Xena and Little Britain)
6. I HATE watching the news.
So there's 6 weird things about me... I'm sure there are some weirder one's but these are the one's I could think of.
I will now tag...
1. Byron (who is now known as Coby thanks to a drunk friend at a farewell party!!!)
2. Kait
3. Zephra
4. Matt Alling (you MUST post it in a comment to this thread my friend)
5. Mr. Zebra
6. Gerry
Okay, so I made the last two up... 5 is a Tori song and 6 is my rabbit.... but I honestly don't think that many people read this blog yet...lol...
On another note, I think it would be fun to mention a few things that I find endearing about a certain few friends...they might get a laugh out of it...
Byron: I wish I had his patience, so calm all the time...and I love the fact that we just GET each other.. like the other day he was telling me about his Boss's son being put on a new medication for his ADD and he asked me to guess what it was, and gave me the hint that it was the typical American drug and I guessed straight away that it was Prosac!! See... we just GET each other.
Kait: I just love her. She's my little sis but can be completely insufferable. I love how she has more flip flops than the Queen does shoes. She would wear those things all year round if it didn't mean her feet would get cold, wet or dirty.
Jess: I love her dearly. I love her CRAZY sense of humour because it's just like mine.
Carmy: I love her fierce dedication. I love her feistiness which I think is one of her best traits because it's just pure honesty. I also love the fact that she gave me my new nickname....which will stick til I die.
Stace:.....well... what can I say.. I love your sick sense of humour girl. You just crack me up. I think I agree with your comment on online friendships too...
So there you have it.. a bit for verbal vomit...
What do you find endearing about your friends?
HAPPY BIRTHDAY KYRA!!!!!!!!!!!
Fooooooooor she's another year older
For she's another year older
For she's another year olderrr
And that's a crying Shame
Sheeeee'll never get any younger
She'll never get any younger
She'll never get any youngerrrrr
Aaaand That's a crying shame!!
Happy Birthday Honey. I hope you had a great time on your trip!
And just for you.... the drawing above. :-)
Quote of the week
"My flip flops are hanging on the back of my door and they look pretty."
Courtesy of my sister on the phone last night.
She was also telling me a story of the kids she minds and how they were playing a game where they had to get away from an imaginary flood. She found them hiding under the table, which I thought to be most amusing!! LOL. Needles to say her rational explanation of why you can't hide under a table in a flood was lost on the darlings.
Also, just for the heck of it, and because I know Kyra will worship me if I post one, here is another drawing.
10 points for guessing who this is of.
Hint: it's from a scene in a movie that starred Tommy Lee Jones in a fugitive type story as well as the beautiful woman pictured above.
Come on.. GUESS.... you know you want to.
Dark Tourism
Recently, while watching BBC world I tuned into a program on Dark Tourism which focused on the events of 9/11 and Ground Zero. The program was debating whether or not Dark Tourism is a viable learning tool, or if it is just a morbid excuse for mass entertainment.
Given my tendency towards the importance of history, I lean towards the former.
Ground Zero is the leading source of tourism in New York today and it attracts people from all over the world. Not just because they want to be a part of the band wagon, but also because it grabs at the heart of core emotional values.
I garuntee you that every single person in the western world today (and possibly even in non-western parts) will know what they were doing at the exact moment (like when Princess Di was killed) the first plane hit, that moment when they flicked on the tv, the radio or opened the newspaper when they realised that what they were witnessing was not a scene from a movie nor a hoax of some kind, but that it was horrifyingly real and happening right under our noses. Whether you are American or not, this affects, and will continue to have an effect on New York and the world for many, many years to come.
As a traveller and tourist myself, I can see the value of the world's largest ecomony and am all for the good it can bring to places, especially when those places rely soley on tourism. I believe such horrific events such as 9/11 should not be under rug swept in any aspect, but rather, should be open for remembrance and also available to teach. Things like this should not be forgotten, for to forget the past, is to repeat it in the future.
This is why places like the Killing Fields in Cambodia, Auschwitz, or even the American Civil War battlefields are immortilised with museums and re-enactments. They not only tell a story of the culture they stand in, but also of humanity. But it is up to the individual traveller to be responsible and to respect the country and culture they are travelling through. So the question is raised.. do places like ground zero encourage this? Or do they simply add to the hoardes of people who come every year and put strain on the locals?
Some would argue that to visit such a place is morbid and that cities like New York should be focusing on their other attractions like The Empire State Building or the Statue of Liberty (which is a story in itself) and the truth is that whether it is liked by people or not, all three of these tell a story, each as important as the other. The point is that they are all a part of history and they should all be available to the public so we can learn and remember.
This need for us to visit such places or events has been around for thousands of years. Millions flocked to the Colesseum to watch Galdiatorial combat and even moreso when they were crucifying Christians. A monument stands for the 300 Spartans that gave their lives to slow down the Persians in Greece during the Persian Wars over two thousand years ago and every year on July 25 thousands of Aussies and Kiwi's make a pilgrimage to Gallipoli. I do not believe we as humans like pain or suffering. I believe that we visit such places to remind ourselves that we are human, and no matter what atrocities we suffer, we will come through. The sadest part is that the worst of them, we do to each other. And deep down, no one can understand that. This, I believe, is why Dark Tourism gains such interest.
Superhero Quiz..
Your results:
You are The Flash
| The Flash |
| 95% |
| Supergirl |
| 90% |
| Wonder Woman |
| 85% |
| Superman |
| 65% |
| Green Lantern |
| 60% |
| Iron Man |
| 60% |
| Spider-Man |
| 50% |
| Robin |
| 50% |
| Catwoman |
| 40% |
| Hulk |
| 35% |
| Batman |
| 10% |
|
Fast, athletic and flirtatious.
 |
Click here to take the "Which Superhero are you?" quiz...Although I would like to complain that there are no Buffy, Xena and Dark Angel options on here... and what about Jean Gray, or Batgirl, or Rogue???
And nowwww.. For a bwief musical intewlude!!!
Okay, so this is just something fun I picked up off my friend Kyra's site. I post these questions here and then whoever visits has to answer them. Pretty cool me thinks. So here goes. I'm Also going to answer the questions for Kyra...
Questions
1. I'll respond with something random I like about you.
2. I'll tell you what song/movie reminds me of you.
3. I'll name something we should do together.
4. I'll say something that only makes sense to you and me (or just me).
5. I'll tell you my first/clearest memory of you.
6. I'll leave you a quote that is somehow appropriate to you.
7. I'll ask you something that I've always wondered about you.
8. If I do this for you, you must post this on your journal. You MUST!
Answers for Kyra.
1. Your sense of humour and your warmth.
2. The Craft.
3. Party the night away in your home town.
4. "If I had to go the rest fo my life without companionship knowing myself won't be a problem."
5. Way back when in chat, that wicked sense of humuor.
6.Something Wicca this way comes.
7. Dude... how tall are you?
Okay, so now that you get what to do.. post away!!! I'll give answers for anyone who leaves something here. :)
It's MAY!!
And I have 53 days to go until I leave on my trip!!! YAY! I got my passport back yesterday with my visa inside which was SUCH a relief, I have NO idea what I would have done had hey refused me a visa. Now I just hope they don't refuse me entry to the UK... then I'll be in trouble!
So I fixed my blog, for those of you who noticed it was all skewiff... took me HOURS because I am a total retard when it comes to html and I lost ALL of my custom settings, like my links to other blogs (sorry about that guys) and my favourite webpages.. but when I get some more time I'll put them all back.
Until then, I thought you might enjoy another picture of mine.
